52: ‘Blow me (one last kiss)’ by P!nk

Children don’t see the full truth about their parents’ lives. Gaga and Rachel, Natasha’s daughters, didn’t see the tears, that were a big part of Natasha’s dreaming away. They only saw her mother’s mental absence.

Gaga and Rachel, Natasha’s daughters, don’t see the tears, that are a big part of Natasha’s dreaming away. They only see her mother’s mental absence.

But the tears are there, burning up her eyes. They are there along with milky-white knuckles  and sweaty palms from desperately hanging on to the life she and her husband, Steven, who is also the father of her two daughters,  has had, however little love there has been in it.

And there is still something to cling onto. Or at least so it seems. Steven still reaches out for her at night. But Natasha has begun rejecting his advances by excusing it with headaches. So he clenches his jaw and sleeps with his back to her. And after holding on for a long time, she realises that there is nothing to hold onto  – so she lets go.

Finally, she has had enough. She has done enough thinking and dreaming of better worlds. This is it for their marriage.

Finally, she longer has to deal with his telling her, she is too serious. Her head is spinning from his many words of criticism.Their days are awful, because of this charade and she has had enough. She wants her ignorance of his lack of feeling back because there was bliss in it.

So she tells him to blow her one last kiss. While they are still married, she starts living her own life, completely giving up on behaving like a married woman.

She won’t miss him and all the fights they always had and never let their daughters see.
She will no longer fight, no longer look for something that isn’t there. Instead, she will dress nice, go dancing alone, laugh, get drunk and take somebody home.

Now she’s going to do as she pleases, anything she wants. She will breathe freely at last and not worry about a thing.

And he’ll be sorry for how he treated her.

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jNlIGDRkvQ

Link to lyrics: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/pink/blowmeonelastkiss.html

Confused? Read ”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before (I recommend Natasha and Steven or Steven’s family) or read the whole thing in the proper order by clicking on https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/?order=asc

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48: ‘ My Mamma Said’ by Aqua

Despite the unhappiness that infects Steven and Natasha’s marriage, Natasha stays for the sake of their children. She gives up her life so that they can have a happier life.

Gaga, the older daughter, notices her mother becoming more and more unhappy. And she wants to do something about it. She thanks her for doing it but asks her to leave.

Natasha shakes off her concern. She tells her that  the best thing in life was getting Gaga and loving her higher than anything else in this world, and the worst thing in life is getting used to loving somebody higher than anything else in this world, knowing you’re going to lose it all in time. So she wants to do this for her.

It doesn’t get easier, when Rachel, the younger daughter, is actively working with Gaga. Rachel begs for Natasha to not leave.

Natasha stays. She stays and dies a slow death. Her mind wanders to all that way her life could have turned out. She becomes passive and spends most of her time lying around – and Gaga can’t look at her without crying.

Rachel, however, keeps holding on to her mother, begging her not to leave and run away from her mind and life. To release herself from her imagination and be with her family.

Both daughters circle their mother begging her to listen to them.

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pmG4W0e1Vs

Link to lyrics: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/aqua/mymammasaid.html

Confused? Read ”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before (I recommend Steven’s family) or read the whole thing in the proper order by clicking on https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/?order=asc

Like this chapter? Like it or share it on whichever social media site, you prefer.

Want to influence the story? Add a song to the list by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.

47: ‘Mean Girls’ by Rachel Crow

Natascha and Steven has another daughter, whose name is Rachel. She’s at a boarding school and she is being bullied by the girls there.

They avoid her to the point of leaving the table, when she arrives. They call her names.

This gets to Rachel. She runs home to her room and locks herself in, so she can cry. She hears everyone’s having fun outside, she tells herself, that this is it. She won’t let it get to her no more, she doesn’t want to feel this way.

Why did she let it go so far? She decides to comb them out of her curls and not let them run her world. She will ignore them instead.

She soon has to put this to the test, when everyone is wearing bubblegum-pink, whereas she is wearing blue. They all laugh at her – including a former friend, who’s now very popular. Instead of being devastated and beginning to cry, she gets angry and confront her former friend angrily, taunting her for doing the easy thing and bullying Rachel instead of standing by Rachel’s side. She reminds her, that it might one day be her, who everyone will avoid, because she is no longer cool. And she says, she hopes she will be forgiven on that day.

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTIBDuTxzUw

Link to lyrics: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/rachelcrow/meangirls.html

Confused? Read ”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before (I recommend Steven’s family) or read the whole thing in the proper order by clicking on https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/?order=asc

Like this chapter? Like it or share it on whichever social media site, you prefer.

Want to influence the story? Add a song to the list by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.