Chapter 60: ‘Space Bound’ by Eminem

Steven and Natasha are stuck in a loveless marriage. Or rather that is how Natasha sees it. This is how Steven sees it:

He loves her so much. But after the break-up with Pink years ago, he had difficulties showing his feelings. He had trouble trusting and believed love to be evil.

That belief changed when he met Natasha in Vegas. When they touched, he felt a rush, they both did. With a clutch they sealed a promise of what could be. At first it’s just torturous lust.

Lust turned to love. He starts out by warning her, that he could become dangerous, if she broke up with him, because he has been hurt before. She either didn’t take it seriously or forgot – possibly both.

He was so sweet at first. He told her in complete honesty that she took his breath away.

He would do anything for her. He loved her endlessly and feels weak around her. She felt the same, but held back at first in an attempt to not scare him away. But as she became more and more expressive of her love, his difficulties with showing emotion caused him to draw back.

This was when Natasha stopped believing he ever loved her. And by then he was too withdrawn to argue against it.

So she cut herself loose.  They were now married in name only.

He can stand this for one year and six months. He finds the strength to finally pour his heart out to her.

But by then she no longer wants him. And she no longer wants to talk. She tries to leave. In an act of desperation, he grabs her and chokes her. He ends up snapping her neck.

Tears steaming down his cheeks, he puts a gun to his temple and tells her once more how he much he loves her.

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JByDbPn6A1o

Link to lyrics: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/eminem/spacebound.html

Confused? Read”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before (I recommend Steven or Natasha and Steven for this particular chapter), read the key events (also found in the sidebar) or read the whole thing in the proper order by clicking on https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/?order=asc

Like this chapter? Like it or share it on whichever social media site, you prefer.

Want to influence the story? Add a song to the list by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.

 

56: ‘Misery Business’ by Paramore

Nicki can’t make the group kick Gaga out, so she still have to see her.

Their animosity grows. When Nicki becomes interested in a guy, Gaga steals him, before she can do anything about. Nicki is her own vindictive self and plans to steal him back, now with added motivation. Yes, Gaga has a body like an hourglass, but the relationship is doomed to fail some day.

Gaga and The Guy date for eight months, before Gaga lets him out of sight long enough for Nicki to charm him by telling him, he was the only for her.

Now she gleefully shows him off and tells Gaga how happy they are and how their wildest dreams are coming true without her.

She has the added satisfaction of knowing, Gaga wishes she had The Guy. More so, because Nicki despises girls like Gaga, who get whatever they want by acting all sweet.

Once again no links (and also more than 25 words).

Like, follow, all that. And here’s to hoping I’ll have my computer back by next week (if nothing else then for the sake of my phone’s survival

55:’wherever I go’ by One Republic

(Let me start of by apologizing for the (possibly) weird format. I’m writing this on my phone. I’ll fix it, once I get my computer back)

Brad has decided to go look for Pink, his wife, again, because he can’t move on from her to someone else. Wherever he goes, an image of her, The Young Pink, follows.

 

Their love isn’t easy and it drives them both mad, but it’s worth it, because of how she makes him feel.

He will work hard to get her back and not like so many others pray for an easy love to fall into their lap.

He’ll tell her all this, when he finds her.

No links this time, because I’m writing on my phone. And it’s more than 25 words. But it’s less detailed than usually. Hope, it still works. For context to this chapter, follow the tags around.

 

Like, follow, all that, if you like it and want to. Information in the menu.

 

 

52: ‘Blow me (one last kiss)’ by P!nk

Children don’t see the full truth about their parents’ lives. Gaga and Rachel, Natasha’s daughters, didn’t see the tears, that were a big part of Natasha’s dreaming away. They only saw her mother’s mental absence.

Gaga and Rachel, Natasha’s daughters, don’t see the tears, that are a big part of Natasha’s dreaming away. They only see her mother’s mental absence.

But the tears are there, burning up her eyes. They are there along with milky-white knuckles  and sweaty palms from desperately hanging on to the life she and her husband, Steven, who is also the father of her two daughters,  has had, however little love there has been in it.

And there is still something to cling onto. Or at least so it seems. Steven still reaches out for her at night. But Natasha has begun rejecting his advances by excusing it with headaches. So he clenches his jaw and sleeps with his back to her. And after holding on for a long time, she realises that there is nothing to hold onto  – so she lets go.

Finally, she has had enough. She has done enough thinking and dreaming of better worlds. This is it for their marriage.

Finally, she longer has to deal with his telling her, she is too serious. Her head is spinning from his many words of criticism.Their days are awful, because of this charade and she has had enough. She wants her ignorance of his lack of feeling back because there was bliss in it.

So she tells him to blow her one last kiss. While they are still married, she starts living her own life, completely giving up on behaving like a married woman.

She won’t miss him and all the fights they always had and never let their daughters see.
She will no longer fight, no longer look for something that isn’t there. Instead, she will dress nice, go dancing alone, laugh, get drunk and take somebody home.

Now she’s going to do as she pleases, anything she wants. She will breathe freely at last and not worry about a thing.

And he’ll be sorry for how he treated her.

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jNlIGDRkvQ

Link to lyrics: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/pink/blowmeonelastkiss.html

Confused? Read ”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before (I recommend Natasha and Steven or Steven’s family) or read the whole thing in the proper order by clicking on https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/?order=asc

Like this chapter? Like it or share it on whichever social media site, you prefer.

Want to influence the story? Add a song to the list by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.

50: ‘Believe Again’ by Brinck

The doctor refuses to father Pink’s children. Heartbroken, she goes back on medication. They make her melancholic and thinks back to all her previous relationships.

They made it so easy for her to fall in love. She saw a future with them, but they never saw one with her.

She lost herself in every relationship. And when it fell apart, she picked up her broken heart and taped it together, each time a little weaker.

And now she finds herself just wanting to believe in love. Just believe that it could be possible, after failure after failure. She wants to breathe again, to go back to the days, where she innocently believed in love, because she hadn’t actually had any experience with it.

She wonders if it just her, or if everyone eventually loses their hope for love.

She wants to trust and hope again. For without love, what do we become?

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqw8rHBzTgc

Link to lyrics: https://www.eurovision.tv/event/lyrics?event=1482&song=24727

Confused? Read ”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before (I recommend Pink) or read the whole thing in the proper order by clicking on https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/?order=asc

Like this chapter? Like it or share it on whichever social media site, you prefer.

Want to influence the story? Add a song to the list by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.

48: ‘ My Mamma Said’ by Aqua

Despite the unhappiness that infects Steven and Natasha’s marriage, Natasha stays for the sake of their children. She gives up her life so that they can have a happier life.

Gaga, the older daughter, notices her mother becoming more and more unhappy. And she wants to do something about it. She thanks her for doing it but asks her to leave.

Natasha shakes off her concern. She tells her that  the best thing in life was getting Gaga and loving her higher than anything else in this world, and the worst thing in life is getting used to loving somebody higher than anything else in this world, knowing you’re going to lose it all in time. So she wants to do this for her.

It doesn’t get easier, when Rachel, the younger daughter, is actively working with Gaga. Rachel begs for Natasha to not leave.

Natasha stays. She stays and dies a slow death. Her mind wanders to all that way her life could have turned out. She becomes passive and spends most of her time lying around – and Gaga can’t look at her without crying.

Rachel, however, keeps holding on to her mother, begging her not to leave and run away from her mind and life. To release herself from her imagination and be with her family.

Both daughters circle their mother begging her to listen to them.

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pmG4W0e1Vs

Link to lyrics: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/aqua/mymammasaid.html

Confused? Read ”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before (I recommend Steven’s family) or read the whole thing in the proper order by clicking on https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/?order=asc

Like this chapter? Like it or share it on whichever social media site, you prefer.

Want to influence the story? Add a song to the list by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.

37: ‘ Call me when you’re sober’ by Evanescence

Pink has disappeared. She is gone and Brad is alone. The mental image of her, that he kept with him, while he was imprisoned, grows up in front of him and shouts blame at him: ”Don’t cry to me. If you loved me, you would be here with me. You want me? Come find me. Make up your mind!”

Make up your mind. Stop sitting around drinking and figure out what to do about this! Take the blame instead of blaming it on Them.

This Pink says, what he imagines the real Pink meant with her silence: ”Should I let you fall, lose it all, so maybe you can remember yourself.”

Remember what he did to her and all of Their victims.

”Can’t keep believing! We’re only deceiving ourselves and I’m sick of the lie!”

The lie of their happy life. What can he do to get her back?

Nothing apparently: ”You’re too late.”

She accuses him of not taking the blame, taunts his shameful secret.

”Must be exhausting to lose your own game.” she taunts.

The game he played balancing secret, Them and Pink. Managing the selfhate he has for his shameful secret.

”No wonder, you’re jaded.” she says hatefully. ”You can’t play the victim this time.”

She doesn’t believe his genuine sorrow over his loss of her, when he only calls on her, when he’s drunk: ”You never call me, when you’re sober. You only want it, ’cause it’s over.”

This makes him argue with her, claiming that she was the one, who burned down their paradise. He was out of Them! He was hers alone!

This doesn’t impress her: ”How could I have burned paradise? How could I!? You were never mine!”

He was theirs, chose Them rather than letting her in on his secret.

”Don’t lie to me. Just get your things.”

He has to untangle his life from hers. Declare her dead. He has to let Pink go.

Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RrA-R5VHQs

Link to lyrics: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/evanescence/callmewhenyouresober.html

Want to influence the story? Add a song to the list by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.

Confused? Read ”What you need to know” (found in the sidebar) to find out what this blog is about. Follow the tags around to figure out, what happened before or read the whole thing in the proper order by adding ‘/?order=asc’ to ‘https://songbysongblog.wordpress.com/’. I recommend ‘Pink and Brad’.