2018, chapter 38: ‘Lithium’ by Evanescence (nr. 150)

History wants to happen. So when one sister gets rid of a curse, the other is cursed instead. In her, it turns into the ability to convince people to do as she wishes. She has kept in check with something called Lithium. But after she broke up with her lover, she needed it to rally her troops, who formerly had been a group of violent individuals creating havoc. She turned them into an army fighting a war. And she has to keep using her powers to keep them motivated.

But like with her sister, the powers have as much control over her, as she has over them. She feels empty, sad and wanting something real. At the same time, though, she feels powerful and truly herself in a way she couldn’t with Lithium. Lithium locked her up inside and made her feel less.

She loves her sadness and darkness and finds herself in it. But at the same time, she hates it and wishes she could let it go.

She invites another man into her bed, so she doesn’t have to sleep alone. But he showcases her emptiness rather than hide it. She lashes out and blames him for not saying he loves her.

He cowers but does not leave. She sees his reaction, forgives him and calls him Darling. After all, anything is better than to be alone.

Once she is alone again, she curls up in a corner. She can feel that her having these powers, and feeling this, is wrong somehow. Something is wrong with her

But she needs her powers, needs to let them loose, to get what she wants. She has to fall into this feeling and keep the fight going.


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