Chapter 16: ‘Tired’ by Alan Walker feat. Gavin James (nr. 128)

Taylor and Will have a rocky relationship. Problem is, they’re not the only people in this fight. They have a son named Alan, standing on the sidelines.

Alan is so young, that his parents think they can hide their tears from him and pretend to be fine, but old enough for that not to be true at all. Alan sees it and feels helpless. He has noticed the packed bags, that has been standing there for weeks now. It was packed at midnight, so he didn’t see who packed them.

They don’t realise what leaving would mean. So he does what he can do to love them both to remind them. They both tell him that they’re alright. He sees straight through their white lies.  But he lets them lie because then they dare to be vulnerable around him. They don’t hide.

They’re being pulled apart and losing themselves. But he can put them back together. He just has to love them and wait.


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37: ‘ Call me when you’re sober’ by Evanescence

Pink has disappeared. She is gone and Brad is alone. The mental image of her, that he kept with him, while he was imprisoned, grows up in front of him and shouts blame at him: ”Don’t cry to me. If you loved me, you would be here with me. You want me? Come find me. Make up your mind!”

Make up your mind. Stop sitting around drinking and figure out what to do about this! Take the blame instead of blaming it on Them.

This Pink says, what he imagines the real Pink meant with her silence: ”Should I let you fall, lose it all, so maybe you can remember yourself.”

Remember what he did to her and all of Their victims.

”Can’t keep believing! We’re only deceiving ourselves and I’m sick of the lie!”

The lie of their happy life. What can he do to get her back?

Nothing apparently: ”You’re too late.”

She accuses him of not taking the blame, taunts his shameful secret.

”Must be exhausting to lose your own game.” she taunts.

The game he played balancing secret, Them and Pink. Managing the selfhate he has for his shameful secret.

”No wonder, you’re jaded.” she says hatefully. ”You can’t play the victim this time.”

She doesn’t believe his genuine sorrow over his loss of her, when he only calls on her, when he’s drunk: ”You never call me, when you’re sober. You only want it, ’cause it’s over.”

This makes him argue with her, claiming that she was the one, who burned down their paradise. He was out of Them! He was hers alone!

This doesn’t impress her: ”How could I have burned paradise? How could I!? You were never mine!”

He was theirs, chose Them rather than letting her in on his secret.

”Don’t lie to me. Just get your things.”

He has to untangle his life from hers. Declare her dead. He has to let Pink go.

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